Friday, March 16, 2012

Holding myself responsible- for kids

Last Friday, I mentioned a book I was reading and the premise behind its anti-bullying message.
Today, let me give you one idea they suggest.

Help your child to understand that when there is a conflict, both parties are almost always responsible, even if only a little bit. Blaming one person only makes the conflict greater.

                Ask your child, "Have you ever made excuses for something you shouldn't have done?" (Share an example of your own if they can't think of one.)

                Ask, "Did blaming cause the conflict to get better, or worse?" (Let the child know that taking responsibility for their actions can give the other child courage to do the same.)
             
       Role play a scenario with your child, such as this one:    Carl and Janie worked together on a class project. They just got it back, and discovered they only earned a C because an important part of the project had been left out.
     First, have them role play it as it would likely play out, "You didn't..." "Yeah, well you never..." Then, have them try it again, using "I" instead of "you", taking responsibility, even in a small way.

Maybe worth a try if this is an issue for your child! Happy parenting.

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1 comment:

Shannon Lawrence said...

Good advice. My son dealt with a bully situation in preschool and taught me an important lesson about befriending the bully. When he told him he didn't like being treated that way and invited him to just play with him, the bullying stopped for the entire class. Bullies are bullies for a reason. My son is much kinder and more level headed than I am.

Shannon at The Warrior Muse, co-host of the 2012 #atozchallenge! Twitter: @AprilA2Z